i am so unhappy, i have to write a post about it.

maybe it's work stress, cant believe he called me unreasonable. true enough his did make sense and sounded more reasonable enough. but i was hungry too. miserable pay of 500 but i dont even get OT pay. what can i do?

all i needed was someone to dote on me and coax me when im upset. in reality, im getting all the yelling and scoldings.

i think maybe im too childish for him. i really dont know how to be understanding at times. i aint thoughtful enough. i feel so ashamed of myself.

but i cant really take it anymore. and ya know, i really have this gut feeling if i were to give up this r/s, he would agree. thats how much confidence i have in him loving me - minimal. to a point i think he would let go easily too.

i really dont know what happened. the number of sweet things he do, is almost n now. no more pick ups, no more movie/dinner tgt, idk whats left of us. we dont even hold a proper conversation. i cant feel his TLC at all.

have i really not met the guy yet? why am i always struggling. i alr tried so hard to surpress my emotions/temper but recently it just goes off like RAHHHHH. i think its just me to be unreasonable and demanding.

you think so?

i think i need a break.

HELLO ALL!!!

celebrated grandma's bday today.
had buffet dinner at her house.
i could tell she was happy.
cos my second eldest cousin brought her BF!
my aunt was so worried that she couldnt find a partner initially -.-
nevertheless! i saw grandma's face lit up and it looked like ^0^
:) :) :)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GRANDMA!!
lovelove.

HOWEVER,
im kinda worried about my grandpa.
my grandpa story is rather complicated
so it's not really convenient to mention here.

the most worrying thing is just
that day he got lost while driving.
he was just outside at the prata shop
so he got off the car and asked for directions back HOME.
:( :( :(
and then, he kept forgetting where he kept his money
and accused the maid of stealing his money.
changed maid once alr.
this current one is gg to quit too.
:(
they even changed the lock alot of times
cos he misplaced the key?!!
:( :(
he keeps nagging these days.
like old aged pms.
poor grandma has to put up w him always.
sigh, how long can this continue?

it's just soo depressing to hear such stuff.

i really just pray and hope the best
for all my grandparents.
every single one of them.
that would be 4.

please please be well.

last but not least,
i really look forward to the USS trip w b this sat.
like we hardly spend a full day tgt.
IM GONNA TAKE TONS OF PIX HOR.


realised i've been really low profile about me being in a r/s
cos initially i wasnt sure myself.
but i guess now more of you know.
and i feel kinda bad that i didnt tell you guys earlier.
cos everyone's screaming at me like,
"OMG YOU'RE ATTACHED?!!
HOW COME I DIDNT KNOW?!!
DID YOU EVEN PUT ON FB?!!
THAT'S SO NOT LIKE YOU!!
AM I THE LAST ONE TO KNOW?!!"

yesyes everyone is saying.
but no, you're not the last to know. haha.
there're ppl who still dont know about it yet.

recent matter made me realise he care about me actl
and he put alot of trust on me.
however, he's really not v romantic la huh.
so sometimes just dont feel loved -.-
im still happy when i put in effort to brighten his day.
his smile is soooo.. cute.

i know what i want for xmas alr.
i want another string or chain to replace the current one
the current one is like cui. some 4 yr old string.
b, you got the hint? ;)

*WINK WINK*


PEOPLE, MEET ME SOOON.
INTERNSHIP VERY BORING YA KNOW.
VERY NO LIFE.

see yaaaaa :)