PROFILE

SAY YOU LOVE ME!

throbbing headache. urgh, this is like the 2nd time in my life im having headache and it's also the 2nd time at work. good thing today i dont have much work. stupid headache..........




I still got day 3 and 4 of the Singapore Amazing Flying Machine which i havent update btw.


im back at work once again. cant wait for the 2 weeks to fly by cos i hate work (tho i dont have much work to do). but at the same time, i count the only 2 wkends i have left, i wished i had more time to spend with my friends and family. urgh, life.


i had terrible cramps last night which caused insomnia and backaches. i toss and turn in bed and i cant help feeling lost. im alone agn. 2 pink pills and a blanket kept me warm last night. all i hope is that i wont have to experience/bear with all these over there in china. i think my throat's dying too.




DAY 5







The reason why we fell in love:
http://www.redas.com/Html/showcasing/Newton%20suites/interior.html

the showflat's interior design was the best of its kind. they designed walls of room (my bro's current room) using glass. (refer to the right side of the picture) but somehow when we got the house, it was a concrete wall. -.- how real...



and later on i realised only today after 8 months plus i know about this:
http://www.asiaone.com/Business/Story/A1Story20080724-78568.html

like omg.. that's why when ppl ask which one, i say the forest-y one. my family never seem to escape the insect kingdom. BLEAHHHH...




alright, the new paper just rubbed salt into all our wounds when that photo was published. seriously, f.


i guess it's time to really pull ourselves together and train on better transitions and stunts starting from now. i really hope * will stay on and fight this battle with us next yr. im praying and hoping for the best now. i cant imagine doing stunts without her. she's just too impt a partner to me :(


comp ytd was not only sad cos of that matter, but partly also cos my friends didnt turn up despite the fact i invited them to! :( i wonder what's the diff between last yr and this yr when i invited them this yr and they didnt come. might as well dont ask?


well, i understand why michael and elijah couldnt come. i asked atikah to help msg everyone, but no one replied other than nicholas and eevann. eevann msged me to say good luck for toilet bowl contest, when i asked if he's coming, i nv heard from him again. i talked to nicholas on sunday night over msn and i realised, nicholas was waiting for confirmation from atikah to come. nicholas msged bryan and bryan happily didnt reply, stacey msged bryan to ask if he's coming(what an irony, she didnt reply atikah), and bryan casually told her "see first" when he's confirm coming? bryan still got the cheek to ask me not to tell the rest that he came to watch? best of all, atikah didnt tell me anything till her tag appear on my blog.


what has happened to the world. now im thinking: why didnt i ask my ij girls. the reason i gave myself was, i was too busy with itp and training. bullshit right.


i now conclude, i've neglected everyone too much, and they abandoned me without me realising. ahh well... i lost, flat. i pretty much guess, no one cant live w/o anyone. im so right, right? HA HA.


in a few weeks time you guys wont hear from me anymore, and you know what, i think yall wont even realise. :)


im just speaking my heart and being frank. i think i've changed alot ever since i enter poly. but what to do, life's doing all these to welcome me to this real world. i no longer know if im awake or aslp.


tata-




CHEEROBICS this year was... disastrous. :(


the biggest mistake we made: to fall from the last stunt which is the most important part of the whole routine.


what i feel is that, on top the last stunt which really turned out bad, our whole routine was still not there yet. our movement and timing are not synchronised most of the time, few forgot the dance, and a few of the stunts were down. so i guess its not just the last thing which caused our downfall, its everything that everyone did.


and, we shld not let this matter bring us down. indeed, i agree it's rly traumatic to see success come crushing down within a second. i came out of the competition ground, i was holding back my tears. when i couldnt take it, i hugged ass and i cried with all the tears and gross stuff on him. i never knew i would cry over a competition. (okay i did, when i was in ij red cross, we got 1st in footdrill, i rly cried, cos i felt so proud of myself and my squad mates.)


so what we can do now, is to bring ourselves together, train harder, improve, and prove to others that:

YES! SP GUSTO CHEERLEADERS CAN DO IT!!!!!




YOU KNOW WHAT, A VOLCANO IS ABOUT TO ERUPT. IF YOU'RE AFRAID THAT YOUR LIFE WILL BE IN DANGER, OFF YOU GO.


IM IN A DAMN FREAKING PISSED OFF MOOD. I WONDER WHERE DID ALL THESE MOOD SWINGS COME FROM. THEY ARE EITHER CAUSED BY PMS OR JUST PURELY STRESS AND TIREDNESS. BUT WHERE THE HELL DID THE STRESS COME FROM. FREAK. DEFINITELY NOT CAUSED BY WORK, COS I CAN EVEN ENJOY MY WORK NOW THAT I ALREADY ADAPT TO THE ENVIRONMENT. SO ANYONE TELL ME WHERE DID IT COME FROM. OKAY NO ONE WILL KNOW, NO ONE, OTHER THEN ME MYSELF AND I.

I GET IRRITATED AND ANNOYED EASILY, AND RECENTLY MANY THINGS HAVE MADE ME BEHAVE/TURN OUT LIKE THIS. FIRST THIS, SECOND THAT. IT'S JUST, EVERYTHING! AND CHEER IS CAUSING EVERYONE TO BE IN A REALLY FOUL MOOD, OKAY MAYBE JUST A FEW INCLUDING ME. I REALISED HOW DIFFICULT IT IS TO BALANCE WORK AND TRAINING. AND I MEAN 9AM-7PM WORK, 7PM-10PM CHEER. HOW MANY FREAKING HOURS AM I LEFT WITH FOR MYSELF. I BARELY HAVE ENOUGH SLP EVERY NIGHT. AND YES, YOU MUST BE THINKING IF THATS THE CASE, WHY AM I STILL BLOGGING. I WILL TELL YOU NOW FRANKLY. IM TOO PISSED TO SLP.

THE FEELING IS LIKE, HEARTACHE, ANNOYED, STRESSED, DEPRESSED AND NO SELF-ESTEEM AT ALL. AT THE END OF THE DAY IT FELT LIKE, I LOST EVERYTHING, IM LEFT WITH NOTHING BUT MYSELF, ALONE ON THE BED THINKING WHY ARE ALL THESE HAPPENING TO ME. WHY CANT THINGS BE BETTER. WHY CANT I BE BETTER. WHY CANT I HAVE MORE SELF ESTEEM. WHY DID I CHOOSE TO GIVE UP. WHY AM I A WEAKLING. WHY DID I DO THOSE STUFF I DID...


WHY AM I LEFT ALONE?



I SO HATE THE WORLD FOR ALLOWING A WEAKLING TO BE ON IT. I HATE MYSELF.




(im sorry if one day i can no longer stay with you.. ihm)




(this is damn annoying. ahh well, nevermind. just ignore. im too busy to care alr. as usual... so much for being the odd one out.)

i think i really cant stop fidgetting about. it's damn uncomfortable. seriously seating in the office 5 working days from 9-7 not only make you FAT, it also makes your whole back aches like hell. uiwehfuygdner.

okok, time to lose some fats since comp is next sunday. maybe i'll just get atikah and elijah to come watch and take video and photos for me.

Event: CHEEROBICS 2009
Date: 22nd March
Venue: Outside Zouk

coolest cigarette shitz i've ever seen. cocktail cigarettes!








the whole aim of coming home alone is ruined. what's the point?!!!!! sick&tired.




my collegues are playing with this hugggggeeeeee DJ machine, in the office! WOAH, like how happening can they get. they're like mixing the songs and stuff. uber cool! :D


and as usual, im slacking awayyyyyy. yipeeeeee. ytd was much busier. but i managed to finish all the work. HOO-RRRRRRAYYYYYY!


bounce, bounce!

TAKE A PEEK AT WHAT'S IN MY BAG!

i was browsing through some past years photos and guess what, i found THIS. omg, i think it's damn cute. :/ haha. and it was taken EXACTLY a year before. bangs.






YAY! i trashed ting jie in a pool gameeeeeeeee. yay!!!!!!! :D let me tell you a secret: im at work now!!! HAHAHA.

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